Smite me, almighty smiter... I mean weather god....

I love Vancouver weather. Really, I do. I think the weather gods really do just love playing with our minds, snickering quietly to themselves while we mumble and grumble and convince ourselves that no, we *are* going to leave the warm embrace of our beds and brave the outdoors. I'm not quite sure what we've done to spurn the almighty weather deities, but I swear I can hear them laughing at me right this very minute. They toyed with us yesterday and let the sun come out, even if only for a few hours. Then it was back to this record-breaking spell of rain. Most rainy days in January. Ever. Most rain in January. Ever. OK, not ever, but on record anyways. Booooo. Saturday. Rained all night. Which means snow on the local ski hills. Of course, said snow can melt at a moment's notice, so one must avail oneself of the opportunity to launch oneself down a hill on a slippery board. The sun's coming out when I wake up, so I pick up my friends A and K, and we head up to Seymour. Get almost to the top and there's TRAFFIC like we've never seen. Apparently somebody forgot to plough the parking lot. Good planning people. So finally we park, get our gear on and head to the ticket window. Main lift is closed. But *might* open in 10 minutes. Great. So we wait for my other friend L who was supposedly right behind us in the traffic jam. And we wait. And we wait. Turns out she parked halfway down the hill and just walked up. Fair enough. Finally the chair opens, and we get to the top of the run just as the fog rolls in. And brings a nice dose of FREEZING RAIN. Which of course finds its way into every nook and cranny that isn't completely covered by tuque, goggles, and scarf. That burned. Oh that burned. Visibility was crap. I could barely see the end of my board. Seriously. So of course I hit this massive snow pile and go for a nice spill. Wind knocked right out of me. Tuque, goggles, and a glove get lost in the snow and once I dig them out they're just crusted over with wet West Coast snow. Perfect. This is going to be a great day. I can feel it. So I manage to make two more runs, and halfway down the second, I biff again. Big time. Now my hair is completely covered in icicles. I look like a munchkin snow monster sasquatch. Snow is down my pants, up my shirt, on my eyelashes. Miserable I am. Time for lunch. Lunch was actually pretty uneventful. My quesadilla was surprisingly HUGE and very good. The spiked coffee was also good. Warm beverage + liquor. Whoever thought of that is genius. Pure genius. After lunch, L discovers that half of one of her bindings is missing. Not one of the ratchet straps, the front ankle strap of her binding. So she goes off with A to find a repair shop and hopes that this isn't going to be an expensive problem to deal with. K and I head back up the hill, and realize that the freezing rain has stopped. Maybe we'll actually start to have some fun! And sure enough, we do. We're totally wet and a little cold, but we had a couple of good runs. Went to go look for A and L to see if L's board had been fixed.. couldn't find them. Cell reception nonexistent. Oh well, time for another run. Just then, K realizes that one of the screws that holds her binding to her board has come loose. And we have no screwdriver. She debates going to the repair shop and then decides that she'll chance it. I counsel against it, but she's determined. So up we go. We ended up making it down fine until near the bottom when we manage to crash into each *other*, which never happens. I take the worst of it, landing flat on my back facing down the hill. Takes me 5 minutes before I'm able to get back on my board and finish the run. I'm DONE for the day. We ran into A and L at the chairlift, they were done for the day too. (L's binding got fixed and it only cost $9, so that was alright). L was about to take off down the hill and walk to her car, I said, "dude, it's dark, the road's slippery, drivers are morons, just get in the car and I'll drive you to your car". So we pile 4 girls and three snowboards into my car (I don't have those new-fangled flip-down seat thingers) and head down the hill to where L *SWEARS* she left her car. It's not in the lot. We wonder if there's another lot a bit further down the hill. No such luck. So we turn around and head back up. No car. We check every little parking lot on the side of the road. No car. Back to the lodge it is to ask if maybe the stupid thing got towed. Sure enough it had. Time to go all the way back *down* the hill to go pick it up. I'll leave out the part about how we got slightly lost and how traffic lights just would not work for us. So towing place was across the street from Tim Hortons. PERFECT. A, K, and I will go in for hot chocolate while L gets her car. 10 minutes later, L walks in BAWLING (and I've only ever seen her upset like once or twice in the 10 years I've known her). Between her recent vacation and Christmas and what not, she's maxxed out her credit card and can't pay the towing bill. So without hesitation, I march her back to the towing place and bail her out. She'll pay me back. I know where she lives. So after all that, we finally sat down to a rather delicious Tim Horton's hot chocolate. And went home. And lay on the couch comatose for the rest of the evening. I was only too glad to get into my PJs and fall asleep watching TV. And thus ended our terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Of course, it really wasn't a horrible day. We all go home safe in one piece, with our respective vehicles and all our snowboard parts. But it was about the most miserable day of snowboarding I've ever had. So girls, we going up next Saturday??